Flirting at its best

So I’m awaiting my flight in the Las Vegas McCarran airport and I’ve just witnessed the worst bit of flirting I’ve ever heard. So basically we’re all sitting next to each other at the gate; the gate for the plane that goes to New York. We are all fucking going to JFK. We’re all getting on the same fucking plane. It’s obviously not making any stops. Chances are most of the people on this flight will be staying in New York. So let’s talk about how this mother fucker hits on this girl. So the three of us are sitting together and we were actually talking. I thought I was actually about to make some friends here finally. But this fucking moron decides he has to hit on this girl. Probably because he’s so god damn ugly he figures the more girls I hit on the better chance I have. But whatever, do what you gotta do. But do you want to know his line, people? He asks the girl where she’s going (totally fucking ignores me this cock sucker). She obviously says New York, because we’re all at the same gate. He says “oh really, where?” She tells him bedstuy and he asks, “where is that” Fine. So far he’s doing okay. Asking the girl about her life. That makes sense. But then he says, “where’s that?” and she says “Brooklyn.” To which he responds, like a fucking moron, “oh wow, that’s where I’m from, such a small world.” First off, that’s where you’re from!?!  You’re from Brooklyn but you don’t know what bedstuy is. Second, cmon man if you’re gonna lie, do better. I have a friend who has convinced people he’s visiting from fucking Ireland. You can’t even pretend you’re from fucking Brooklyn you moron. I almost want to start flirting too (don’t worry bae I won’t) just to make this guy feel like an asshole. But cmon. How the fuck you about make lies up about where you live and not have any background. At least have a good back story. Make it somewhat grounded. No, this moron has no idea where Brooklyn is, but he decides that’s where he’s from. Hey man, I’m not saying I’ve never been a fuck boy, but please do better man. DO BETTER.

Published by Your Cousin Vinny

I'm just a guy, who really is trying to figure out what the move is.

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